Only 3 months I have stayed here
But you have become to me so dear
For reasons I cannot fathom and comprehend
But maybe you're just that kind of a friend.

It's Nancy's last day...And before you know it, it'll be Judy's, too.  It's so rare that you find people who touch your heart so much in so little time and these two are precious to me for that reason.

I first met her after she came back from her study leave [she took the CIA exam, parts 1&2...she passed, btw! *thumbs up*] and I found her friendly but reserved.  I thought she was Then we became friends as we became jogmates [dyan sa tabi-tabing park malapit sa office]..GRABE, ang GANDA ng legs ng taong ito! =)  Then breakfast almost everyday became a cherished part of our daily routine where we can hang around for a bit and talk about anything and everything under the sun.

But then, the winds of change came and and is now taking her away from us in the direction of another bank [a foreign bank where she got a very good offer].  We had a farewell party for her and Emma [another auditor who was leaving by today] and it was astonishing how many people cried [including me..*teary-eyed*] coz she was leaving.  A text I received came to mind stating, "Its better to devote more attention to a successful exit than a favorable entrance.  What matters isn't being applauded when you arrive, but being missed when you leave."  How I envied her for having touched so many lives during her stay just like how Sir Ramon Sy deeply affected the lives of his employees [I hope Sir Sy's condition is now better, he had a mild stroke yesterday =(...]  I hope to become like her someday.

Though I won't get to see her anymore everyday and talk to her as much as I would like to, I will keep the faith that our friendship will survive the winds of change.

I inserted her last email to me:

Flor,
 
Sobrang short ng bonding moments natin but I am very grateful to be your friend.  *deleted text--too personal*…I will keep my promise.
 
I am happy to see you around….

I will pray na matuloy na ang UK mo…para magkita tayo dun…and maachieve mo lahat ng goals mo in life…kayang kaya mo naman eh!!
 
Sayang, short lang ang pagsasama natin…..pero ang bilis ng kapit J (mighty bond)

Continue your bubbling ways, maraming natutuwa sa iyo niyan….at ang pagiging fashionista…galing mo talagang pumorma….(para magazine model J)

I will pray also na you will find MR. Right… wish ko yan sa akin and to some ay many of my friends…...and be able to move on…… …

Basta if you feel down…andito lang ako ha….you know where to reach me…

Keep in touch my sister…

July 20 --- finally got news from my recruiter, our UK employer is now drawing up our contracts (I hope there's no hidden clauses anywhere..teehee!) and their processing our papers for Visa processing.  My friends and I might probably be flying by October of this year.  Yey! 

With the way things are going (--referring to IBank's transition period), I wouldn't want to be the person who stays and witness the slow degeneration and corruption of this absolutely amazing Bank.  I prefer to have great memories, thank you very much!

I think I've become obsessed with listening to music and relating them to myself...It's disgusting, I know, but my friends who have gone through the same thing as I did, have told me that it's normal and that they went through it, too. (whew! I thought it was going to be another peculiarity of mine...but I do tend to fixate on things that it's scary..recently, I bought a book by Kyan of the Fab 5 just to have it booksigned and steal a kiss from those boy-lovers...hehe..I even pretended to be somebody else just to get my hands on those  tickets! Yes, yes, I'm a bad person..but hey, I did some good with it in the process...I helped a couple get their book signed coz they lucked out on the tickets...and it was the 2nd time they purchased a book!)

So anyway, I've again found another song (by Jojo) that I can associate with and I'd like to share it with you:

Come with me, stay the night
You say the words but boy it don't feel right
What do you expect me to say (You know it's just too little too late)
You take my hand, and you say you've changed
But boy you know your beggin don't fool me
Because to you it's just a game

So let me on down
Cause time has made me strong
I'm starting to move on
I'm gonna say this now
Your chance has come and gone
And you know

It's just too little too late
A little too wrong
And I can't wait
Boy you know all the right things to say (You know it's just too little too late)
You say you dream of my face
But you don't like me
You just like the chase
To be real, it doesn't matter anyway (You know it's just too little too late)

I was young and in love
I gave you everything but it wasn't enough
And now you wanna communicate
Go find someone else
In lettin you go, I'm lovin myself
You gotta problem
But don't come askin me for help
Cause ya know

It's just too little too late
A little too wrong
And I can't wait
Boy you know all the right things to say (You know it's just too little too late)
You say you dream of my face
But you don't like me
You just like the chase
To be real, it doesn't matter anyway (You know it's just too little too late)

I can love with all of my heart baby
I know I have so much to give (I have so much to give)
With a player like you, I don't have a prayer
That's no way to live, yeah oh

It's just too little, too late
Yeah

It's just too little too late
A little too wrong
And I can't wait
Boy you know all the right things to say (You know it's just too little too late)
You say you dream of my face
But you don't like me
You just like the chase
To be real, it doesn't matter anyway (You know it's just too little too late)

I heard that music by that African-American singer again (i forget his name) about him being so sick of love songs but he can't turn off the radio.  Coz I so desperately want "him" out of my head, I immediately scanned other stations and found myself listening to 102.7 and this song was playing with these lyrics:

"I have to let go
Kung yan ang gusto mo
It better be this way
I have to let go
When the time comes
Walang sisihan
Nakarecover nako
Dyan ka na!"

--most probably ito na ang pinakabagay na kanta sakin ngayon, kung alam pa niya tong song, ito na siguro ang ide-dedicate nya sakin. =)  well, yan nga ang gusto ko...and like what i always say, no regrets...sha ang magsisisi..hahaha...biro mo, future sterling pounds earner ata ito! hakhakhak...nawalan sha ng cash cow <--referring to myself as coined by my brother.

Seriously, I had delusions for a while that we might be friends before I go overseas..but facing facts, it will never happen...coz he's a jackass and he'll never change.

I hate how my entries are always about this guy...sa totoo lang, ang dami nang nangyari that are worth a blog entry like my new car (vios 1.3E), my driving stints and "kamuntik na"s, and my ass-f*&^ker for a driving teacher...but I always end up writing something related to him...Someday soon, I know, this too will change. Chin up!  Tomorrow holds a bright future for your love life yet. =)

I asked my brother who he thought was handsomer, Brandon Routh or Christopher Reeve.  He told me that both were handsome....in their own time.  I decided to see the movie for myself this weekend (and I went at the first showing at GB3 with my sis...take note, we live in Marikina! hahaha!  For the love of Superman tlaga itoh!) and di nagkamali ang kuya ko, lumaglag ang panty at bra ko! lolz.  Ang galing ng mga nag-cast, they really got it right.  And he's not just a pretty face to boot, he can act pretty well for someone whose relatively a newbie!

Now I wonder what movies he'll be making in the future...and I wonder if the Superman curse affects his career, too, I hope not, coz I'd really love to see him on the silver screen again.

As for the nemesis, I don't think Kevin Spacey was the best candidate.  Truth be told, Lex in Smallville, in my opinion, fits the bill exactly.  So who do you think would have been a better choice?

About the plot, I expected the twist and I'm curious if there'll be any sequels following it...I don't think so but it doesn't stop me from hoping. hehe.  This is the only movie so far which didn't fail my high expectations...nabusog kasi mata ko kay Brandon..haha.  It just goes to show that I still love happy endings. =)

Star Wars[ 'st?r 'worz ]

• 1. The last refuge of geeks who find Lord of the Rings too literary and Star Trek too technical.
• 2. Science fiction jargon for a trilogy told in six parts.
• 3. The reason kids of all ages make electric humming noises during pretend sword fights.

HelpDesk [ 'help-desk ]

• 1. IT euphemism for slave labor.
• 2. The first circle of computer hell.
• 3. The last line of defense between idiot product managers and idiot users.

I attended an Esther Retreat last weekend in Tagaytay...Esther is a community for single women under the umbrella organization of Light of Jesus.  Its counterpart for single men is called Joshua.

For many years now, I have been looking for the meaning and purpose of my life...they term it nowadays as the quarter-life crisis.  I've tried filling the void I felt with gimmicks, right and left...with travelling...with work...with romantic love...anything but the spiritual.  True that I've begun regularly going to mass and actively seeking out a choir group to make use of the talent I think God gave me, but still, I felt there was something missing.

Then, I begun entertaining the thought of joining a religious community...but in truth, I really feel uneasy about it because of the "corny" or "baduy" connotation when you are identified with a religious group who dances while singing praises, shouts out "hallelujah, Amen" so many times its ridiculous, texts religious messages and other stuff a regular "kewl" person just wouldn't do.  I know so many religious people who are so righteous in my eyes and when they commit sins, the fact that they belong in a community just magnifies it for me because I think they would be kinder, more patient, and just plain saintly and thus, they are not entitled to commit sin! --but hey, their only normal people after all. teehee!

Though I felt this way, I still felt that I should give it a chance...so I attended this retreat.  Well, I did see the dancing while singing praises, the numerous hallelujahs, the Amens, and endured the "forced" sharings...but I couldn't believe it...I actually enjoyed it!!!  Never mind some seemingly comical things we said and did, what I enjoyed are the feeling of belongingness and the teachings shared by the presentors.

One thing that really made an impact on me was what one of the leaders said...that we are like logs in bonfire...together, we make a large fire and create warmth..but take out one, and it will give out less warmth and the fire will eventually die out. 

I've decided to join a community (but I'll probably join SFC coz it has a London, UK Chapter) and though many people may find this manner of praising as silly and utterly funny, I will learn to love it because I definitely don't want to live out a meaningless, cold, and incomplete life. 

PS.  In any case, praising is just one part of what the community does, there are so many other activities that make it worthwhile like helping out the poor. =)

Heto na naman ako...tulirong di maintindihan...nababagot at sawa na sa katitingin ng trabaho na hindi matapos-tapos.  Gusto ko mag-blog pero ala naman akong maikuento na nangyari sakin...kaya't napag-isipan ko, magkuento na lang ako ng buhay ng iba...may sense di ba?

1.  Inoperahan ang sister-in-law ko kahapon...breast cancer...ala na shang left breast at sinusuri pa nila kung kinakailangang pati ang kabila ay tanggalin na rin.  Sa Huwebes o sa Biyernes pa maglabas ng resulta kung terminal ang kaso nya o hindi.  Nakakalungkot, bakit nga ba na napakarami nang technological advances para sa kung anu-ano pero hanggang ngayon ay ala paring paraan para tuluyang mawala ang cancer...kahit naman sabihin na gumaling ka dahil sa chemotheraphy, di naman nawawala, kumbaga eh nakatulog lang pansamantala.  Dko tlaga lubos akalain na maaaring mangyari to sa isang minamahal na kapamilya (sabagay, namatay ang auntie ko sa cancer..pero bata pa ko nun at dko naman sha ka-close, di tulad ng ate ko)...sa mga ganitong pagkakataon, napapaalaala sa akin na dapat bigyang halaga ang buhay at ipakita ang ating pagmamahal para wala tayong pinagsisisihan kung may mangyari man.  Di pa naman tapos ang lahat para sa ate ko, tuloy lang ang dasal at suporta namin, sana lang kayanin ng ate ko na lumaban pa...

2.  Nagbabakasyon sa Thailand ngayon ang nag-iisa kong kapatid na babae..hay, sana ksama ko sha at di lang Thailand ang itinerary..dahil sa nalalapit kong pagpunta sa UK (hmm, sana nga totoo na to..malay mo, may kung anong dahilan ang bigla na lang humadlang sakin), gusto kong ikutin ang Asia at para naman maipagmayabang ko man lang. proud asian kumbaga.  di bale, euro trip na lang muna. ^^/ yeah!

3.  Buong araw naming pinagtsi-tsismisan ng kaibigan ko kung magkano dapat ang kitain namin sa UK...sana nga tanggap na rin sha para may kasama ako at may kahati sa mga gastos sa bahay..hehe.  May isa pa kaming kasama pero lalaki naman, ewan ko kung magkakasama kami sa isang bahay..pano kaya un, e sa pagkakakilala ko dun sa lalaking un, baka di nako makatulog dahil sa kung anu-anong ingay na maririnig ko sa kabilang kuarto..hahaha.  Pero, ang galing talaga ng Internet, nakapagkalap ako ng mga impormasyong tungkol sa mga gastos dun katulad ng renta, pagkain, transportasyon, sine, at tax.  Mukha malaki pa rin ang maitatabi namin..ayus!

Hay naku, ganito na tlg ako ka-hopeless...buhay na ng iba ang topic ng blog ko...kaka-depress...sana magkaroon na ulit ako ng papa...hmmm, pano kaya magmahal ang mga puti? mapapatunayan ko kaya kung totoo ang balita tungkol sa mga puti? lolz.